Tear Jerker

It’s fathers day weekend and in memory of the two grandfathers past and my Dad, my fabulous over-worked Dad-in-law and my Papa I’d like to do a little tribute to the good times. I just re-read this and I’m crying really hard - so just get tissue now. I think we’ve established that I’m a crier - a big one.

Papa had this little car when Mark and I were kids - it smelled just like him - smoke from his pipe and Reeses Peanut Butter cups. When Papa got home he came into the Living Room and took a nap with Thomas the cat and he slept on the duck pillow. As soon as he was asleep Mark and I would go hunt in grandpa’s car for the stray Peanut Butter cups that may have been left in the Extra Large package. I would say that we found a stray Peanut Butter cup more then we went away empty handed - and I know it wasn’t an accident. Just thinking about it makes me smile. Mark and I were trouble, make no mistake about it - our favorite thing to do was to clog the ditch. For some reason we had the idea that the water flowing in the ditch under the driveway NEEDED to stop….and so our goal every morning was to stop the water….boy, that pissed grandpa off. My Papa came to my other grandpa’s funeral and I hugged him so hard - I remember that hug - because he gave me a good squeeze right back - we’re huggers…..sometimes when I get lonely I go back to that hug….I’m glad I took a minute to remember it. My Papa can talk - and so can I so I call him all the time. I miss him too. Do you know he planted a whole woods - and we got to play in it all summer. He actually PLANTED a whole woods - you don’t get much cooler then that. And he takes great photos and the narrative that he gives each one is hilarious, interesting and excessive all at the same time.

My grandpa was a very good man. He loved Oliver’s chocolate and anise candies and the Lawerence Welk Show - he wore great hats and plaid pants and shiny patent leather shoes. He smiled freely and genuinely ever single time. He came home for lunch when the fire whistle blew. He loved the muck (that’s for another blog) and the way he got out of his pickup truck when he got to his favorite building and took a really deep wiff of onions and fresh dirt and said yahhh. He wasn’t a big I love you guy - but you knew that he did….he was just that kind of guy. I remember coming to work with my Dad in the morning and seeing him standing over by the builtins in the dining room putting on after-shave. And I remember him clapping - I’m not sure why I remember this so vividly - but he was a great clapper. But mostly I remember how much my grandpa loved my Dad. He was so proud of my Dad - I don’t know if my dad even knows about this - but he would tell me how proud he was of Dad and Jeff and what they were doing - I’d be eating lunch with Grandpa; Mark and Dad would be down at the muck still and grandpa would tell me that his boys were doing really good work and how smart they were. He taught me to want someone to be proud of me. That, and he liked to drive slow - that I haven’t yet grown to appreciate.

The Fantastic Husbands grandpa - the unbelievably great MIL’s Dad. Wow, he was a force. You walked into a room that he was in and he just had it in the palm of his hand. He had this smile that just got you right where your smile muscles live. He was brilliant - and kind and you couldn’t help but love him. He lived to see Ross happy. And yes, I’m biased and I’m sure that everyone thinks that he lived to see them happy - because that’s how he made people feel. He told people that he loved them, all the time, everyday - he taught me that you just can’t say it enough - because no matter how many times you hear it - it feels good. Having him in my life makes me know how to live a little bit more and better. He wrote a toast at our wedding, I have it still, I printed that toast and put it behind our wedding picture. I look over at the photo and it reminds me of his message. Love each other.

Ah, the Over Worked FIL - Here’s a funny story - Ross and I just got married and MIL and FIL asked if I wanted to call them Mom and Dad - to which I jumped at the chance. We go out to dinner one night and I’m standing directly behind dad and I’m trying to get his attention so I must have said Dad 4 times and finally Mom noticed and Dad was just so oblivious because he’d never had a girls voice calling to him so he just tuned me right out - it’s gotten much better since then. That made me feel really special - I’m the first girl that’s ever called him Dad. Dad has a fantastic laugh - you have to get him out of the office and around his sons but it’s a fantastic laugh - any story where Fantastic husband and the bird are causing trouble and you get a roar of a laugh from Dad. Dad is a true gentlemen - and a gentle man. And he must have learned the whole love you thing from Grandpa because he does it too and I have to say that it’s once again true - you hear it and you just feel special and loved. He’s also an excel -junky - if you have an Excel shortcut he wants to know it.

And the original, my Dad. I am a Daddy’s girl. I am. I have always had what I needed and most of what I wanted because of him and my Mom. Dad was the one that always called me Cass - he is the bar of my success. I work hard, try every single day and smile to make him proud. My Dad loves my Mom - he taught me how to want to be loved. He isn’t a big hugger - but he gives great hugs when you get them. One Christmas he wrote me a card - I have it -when I have a bad day - I get it out and read it. I miss him. I miss everyone. I miss me sometimes too - I miss me being little. The worst feeling that I have is when I see my Mom or Dad upset and I can’t help. My father can be quoted as saying “Don’t Laugh, Let me Tell you” and we like to quote him saying this because it annoys him and we wouldn’t be children if we didn’t enjoy that a little. My dad is a brave man - he tries things that have never been done and he succeeds. My dad can sing the O-e-O-e song also known as Living on a Prayer better then anyone in the world - and I mean that. He can run really fast in our backyard in Roseland. He gives great advice and he’ll always tell it to me straight even though I call to hear what I want to hear. When we were kids he would make soup on a very rare occasion - and it was great soup. My father loves eggnoodles with butter and paprika and I can smell how that smells just thinking about it. He doesn’t like chicken and I think that’s because my grandma could kill a chicken, and not in a good way. He makes very funny faces at young children and likes to make people dance. He taught me to appreciate the piano and my favorite song to play is Brian’s Song because I remember him playing it and I’ve always wanted to play it as well as he did. As kids, a few times a year my father would clean the house - and you could tell on those days that he went to catholic school because he was CRAZED - I remember actually tasting Lysol spray because it was sprayed on so thick. My dad does not like cats - although they like him which I think is a sign that he actually does like cats. My dad can fix things and build things - he has tons of great stuff and he’s patient with me because I like to do and try everything. The summer between high school and college my father paid me to “sort bolts” there were huge five gallon buckets full of nuts and bolts and screws and stuff - it was gross. He paid me to sort them. Do you know how I sorted them, by color. I have a strong hunch there are buckets of bolts somewhere. I think it was sophmore year of college and I was really sick - sick like I somehow walked to health services and don’t remember it at all - apparently I walked there and they put me in an exam room and I got nuts and I actually passed out. I woke up a little while later and someone handed me juice - it was my dad. He came to get me. He was all dirty still from Work - and Mark came too and they helped me get my stuff together with Lisa and they drove me home and I slept on my dads shoulder the whole way. He dropped everything to rescue me and you know what, he would do it today too. You know, no one in the world is like my Dad. I love you Dad.

To dads. Cheers.